i have definitely progressed on the spiritual path over the last few years. But as humans are, we still expect more, or full marks, which is obviously impossible at this stage in time.
IF i am fully honest with myself, I should take "pride" and joy (on a conventional level), that I have learnt and put into application, the Dharma in my daily life. It can be better, I can be more mindful, etc, but I can also take stock once in a while, and rejoice in the good effort thus far.
Learning to manage my expectations is the next lesson that I should learn and realise.
It is also a lesson about attachments. I am attached to my development, to how and what people will judge me with, simply because I am still judgin myself.
We will never cease to exist because that is the Truth. Emptiness is another truth. Hence we need not be overly bothered about results, or about changes (impermanence, rememeber)
One day, I will realise emptiness, and than, nothing will "matter".
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