Hm, think i can use this title to share a lot.
Plenty of learnings tied to the lotus...
I have been chasing after a taiwan drama serial these few days.
And while watching, while getting into all the emotions, the back of my mind is also analyzing the characters using the Dharma.
But while I can see the confusion, the dukkha, the greed and attachment, I am still drawn towards it, towards the emotions of the show. in fact, I let the emotions, the expectations of love, overwhelm me. I know at some level that all those are impermanent, but I cant stop myself when being touched, from being affected, from questioning the conventional aspects of life. (which are all empty at the end of the day)
So there I am, this being, trying to watch a show, but being confused on all levels.
Should I stop watching because I am over involved? Or should I continue and try to analyse and apply the Dharma? OR what?
It saddens me to see the confusion and hurt, and false expectations of the characters. Yet, on the worldly level, I myself seek and want the false promises of worldly love.
There is this internal struggle going on while I watch.
And I know that I am also defiling my mind while watching, but I am not able to train my mind to view it all in terms of the Dharma, not able to watch and use the suffering (of the characters) as my nutrients, to nourish and strengthen my resolve to practice the Dharma, to seek enlightenment.
The lotus rises out of the muddy water, and yet is pure. the mud is its fertiliser, its nutrients, and it allows it to grow.
When will I reach that stage, where everything, every happening around me, will become my nutrients, and propel me onwards towards enlightenment?
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